Poisoning Pigeons in the Park

Have you ever noticed that getting sick makes your mind do weird things?

I left work early today because I have a cold coming on and I wanted to try and stomp it out hard in the early stages, plus I don’t want to spread it around. It’s not the H1N1, or as I call it, the Hiney Virus… just a cold… the same one I’ve gotten all of my life. Starts as a tickle in the back of the throat, then a sore throat, then it moves to the sinuses and causes the drip, drip, drip that keeps me up all night. Once I’m a sneezing, dripping mess, it goes to the chest and settles in so that I get to enjoy coughing up chunks of lung for a couple of days.

When I get a cold in my throat, my voice goes down a couple of octaves and I get my Barry White voice. This is when I want to do all my incoming voicemail messages.

“Hello, you’ve reached the bluuuuuuuuuuz duuuuude. I’m all laid up in my crib so leave a message! Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep, babeh.”

I don’t get sick very often, but when I do, I’m pretty much of a weenie about it. I’ve lived alone for a lot of my adult life and being sick is hard when there’s no one to see how miserable you are. I always thought there should be some kind of Rent-a-Mother service for when you’re sick. You should be able to call a number and they send a nice lady over to bring you some soup, make you some tea, pat your head and go “awwwwwwww, poor thing,” and then go away!

OK where was I going with this? Oh yeah, being sick does strange things to your mind.

When I got home, I tried to take a nap, but really, I’ve already been up, showered, dressed and worked half a day… it’s hard to just drop off. I probably should have scheduled a conference call to help out.

So I’m laying there whacked on cold medicine when my mind starts wandering and I started thinking about my blog.

“I wonder if there’s a way to embed a music file… never seen one done like that without using another service… They do it with movies on YouTube… why can’t they do it with a music file? Y’know, they have music files on YouTube sometimes… I wonder how they do that… Hey, there’s that Windows Movie Maker function on my PC… I bet I could import a music file… Yeah… and then I could download random on-topic pictures to go with it…”

There I was, trying to sleep, but instead attending PC and Internet Basics 101 about 5 years after everyone else in the blogging world. I felt like the cavemen in the beginning of 2001 - A Space Odassey.

So in a fit of trying to change the mental subject, my mind went from my blog to That’s Church and Ginny’s endless war on pigeons. She’s been taking a lot of guff from a group of pigeon lovers lately.
Then suddenly, my mind melded the two subjects… Ginny’s Pigeon War crossed with my potential music editing ability so I now had to get up and see if I could work something out using the Tom Lehrer song “Poisoning Pigeons in the Park”.

Y’know? I’ll be damned if I didn’t figure out how to put together a primitive yet competent little clip in honor of my blogging inspiration.


Note: No pigeons were hurt on account of this exercise, however I was not too proud to scavenge what was already out there. Much like the pigeons.
PS. If none of this makes any sense, remember, I’m sick. Blame the NyQuil.