Cabinetry for Dummies

So we’re a couple weeks out from the Big Reveal and I’m trying not to be bitter.

I said I’m trying… I didn’t say I was successful.

Now we’re at the “Holy Shit, He’s Really Gonna Do It” stage as he’s rolling out his cabinet nominees. Each one seems more heinous than the last. I mean, Gaetz for AG? That’s certainly putting the fox in the henhouse. I just hope there’s some way that the findings from the Congressional investigation into his sex abuse charges make their way public. Someone’s got to leak it. Dirt that good always finds the daylight, eventually.

RFK Jr in charge of  Health and Human Services? That’s like putting a Christian Scientist* in charge of the Food and Drug Administration. It’s not going to be pretty. In this case, people will likely die as a result of the new regime, especially if a new pathogen makes an appearance.

Elon Musk in charge of a new department dedicated to governmental efficiency? This guy forgot to keep some engineers on hand before decimating his Twitter staff.

I can’t wait to see what he throws MTG’s way… maybe she can be the head of NASA and build a defense system to use against those Jewish space lasers.

Perhaps he’ll name Lauren Boebert to run the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms. She’s probably got all the research material she needs, right in her den.

These are all just preliminary nominations but I think they’re going to stick. There may be outside circumstances that do in one or another but it won’t come from Congress. After his big win, do you really think any Republican Senators are going to buck him? All TFG has to do is bark at them once and they’ll roll over and show him their bellies. They are not going to cross him, especially now when he’s got more power than ever and has free reign to legally torment anyone he chooses. These guys will be the rubberiest of rubber stamps.

I saw that President Biden met with him at the White House, a courtesy he never extended when the roles were reversed. I’ve seen people say that maybe he’ll learn something this time around for when it’s time for him to go.

First off, I don’t think he’ll ever just “go.” His nail marks will be on the door frames before he’s finally drug out of there unless it’s on a gurney. But more to the point, he won’t learn a damned thing because this is the way he thinks it’s supposed to be. People cater to him, he caters to no one. He sees such courtesies as a one-way street, always running in his direction.

The only solace I take from this sideshow is that so many of his nominees will be incompetent. His administration might as well be a homage to the Peter Principle, wherein everyone rises to their own level of incompetence. These fools won’t be able to get anything done because they’ll have fired all the people who knew how things worked.

Elon should feel right at home.

 Director’s DVD Commentary: I vacillated a bit on whether to include this explanation because I hate to explain jokes, but since these people aren’t in the headlines anymore, many may have forgotten about them or never knew.

The Christian Scientists were a slice of Christianity that didn’t believe in modern medicine. Whatever illness befell you was God’s will so the only remedy was prayer. Then if someone died, it was because they didn’t pray hard enough or were otherwise unworthy.

I first heard about them in a comedy bit by 60s satirist Tom Lehrer. When introducing a new song he mentioned that it’s been a nervous year and people were “beginning to feel like a Christian Scientist with appendicitis.”