Helpful Stuff to Know

If you're new to Darwinfish2, I figured I should put up some kind of introductory page, chock full of helpful shit about me, my site and the cast of characters sometimes to pop up here.

My family is from Pittsburgh PA and most of my relatives still live there. Though we left "The Burgh" when I was 7, I learned to be a die-hard Steelers and Penguins fan. If the Pirates ever become relevant again, I will be their fan again too. I do root for the local Orioles, as their interests rarely conflict with the Pirates'.

I've also lived outside Chicago for 2 years, Columbus for 5 years, in the farmland outside Toledo for 10, Cleveland for 4, Albany NY for 7, and settled here in Baltimore in 1997.  I've been here ever since. I used to work downtown, ride the subway, and carry a bag, just like a real live grownup, at least until the 'Rona came to town so now I work from home.

So, here are some factoids about Darwinfish2 that may help you understand what it's all about:

• I used to post 3 times per week about all kinds of issues, both national and personal, but now I'm down to once a week and it's almost always about news and politics. I usually respond to comments; I look at comments like the "after-party", and enjoy the give and take
• In my first career, spanning 13 years in the 80s and 90s, I worked in music retail. I've always been a music geek. I'm an entertainment industry junkie. In March of 2010, I posted a series of stories from my music business days, featuring all my brushes with the greats and near-greats.  You can read the first one here, and the next 10 (if you're so inclined) immediately follow. (Just click "newer post.")
• I am an unrepentant liberal and am prone to rant, from time to time, about the narrow-minded religious bigots trying to cram everyone into their particular tight-assed ideology or corporate shills that are trying to take the country away from the average American.
• I have absolutely no use for organized religion. I know that some find comfort in their church and if they can keep it at that, I have no issue. The problem I have is when the Church People try to un-separate Church and State and butt into politics and public policy. Our country was founded, not only based on freedom of religion but freedom FROM religion. Be as religious as you want, just leave the rest of us, who value science over mythology, out of it.  
• From time to time, you'll see "Director's DVD Commentary," either within a post or in Comments. This is where I reveal some behind-the-scenes stuff about the creation of that particular post, or some other peripheral point apart from the main post. It's modeled after the special features that show up on DVDs, where the director or actors talk about making the movie.
• Yes, this blog was once banned in Bahrain.  You can read about it here.
• You'll see some people turn up again and again in my posts...
• Sweetpea: love of my life, partner in crime. We met in January of 2017, which you can read about here.
• My parents: So many of my stories start with them... they have both formed the person I have become.  Mom occasionally comments here as "Mary Ann". We lost my dad in September of 2021 and the loss is still resonating. You may see a "Dad Story" pop up now and again, as I remember them.
• My nephews, Dan (23) and Sam (18). Both belong to my younger brother. I don't have children of my own, so I have to borrow these guys to play with.  
• My best friends, the Chairman of Fuck Off or CFO and the VP of Hell No. Until 2022, both lived in the aforementioned farmland outside Toledo. Now the CFO lives in Houston. We've been friends since high school and a guy could not ask for any better companionship than what I've gotten from these two guys. Of course, they're both Republicans, so we have to agree not to talk politics. We've also lost one... our friend Brill died in 2001 and he will never be forgotten.

Key passages from The Book of Bluz (a work in progress):

Bluz 3:16
"Anyone that claims to know the will of God is a fool or a con.  If they ask for money, it's the latter."

Bluz 3:17
"When in doubt, mind your own fucking business."

Bluz 3:18
Bluz' Maxim of Public Transportation: If you miss your train or bus by less than a minute, the next one will arrive late.

Bluz 3:19
"When you try to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one; least of all, yourself."

Bluz 3:20
"The only power that people around you have over you is that which you give them."

Bluz 3:21
"Bluz Rule of Relationships: One strike, yer out.  You only get one chance to break my heart."

Bluz 3:22

"The only way to guarantee that is doesn't rain is to go to great trouble to carry your rain gear.  The more pieces you carry, (ponchos, rain pants, umbrellas...) the less likely it is to rain."

Bluz 3:23
The Freedom of Speech Fallacy: "When people can't defend the content of a statement, they enthusiastically espouse the right to state it."

Bluz 3:24
Whether it's at a ballgame, a concert, or whatnot, if you're the only one standing up, you're an asshole.  A complete, self-centered, self-absorbed, inconsiderate, flaming asshole.  Everyone else who bought a ticket didn't pay to see your back all night.

Bluz 3:25, Subheading: Advice from Another Childless Douche


Urchin's Law: The perceived cuteness of a child is directly proportional to the emotional connection:

Connection	Perception of Child
Your child	Approaches “deity”
Child of sibling or close relative	Has looks of an angel, wisdom of Buddha
Child of close friend	An angel, with just enough devil to pay back your friend for their prior indiscretions
Child of distant relative	Instrumental in carrying on the family name, not much else
Random child in street or store	Target practice
Child on a plane	The Anti-Christ

*  A kid will give you as much shit as you will take.  You take no shit, you get no shit.
* There is no magic age to start a kid on learning your rules.  They don't just snap-to when they turn 4 or 5.  Training must start on Day One.  (Or at least Day 120)
* Be the parent, not their buddy.  You can try both but the first option has to trump the second.
* As soon as you give in to your child, you give them an incentive to argue about every future point.  They'll always know they've got a shot at getting their way if they can just wear you down.
* A united front is key.  Children are adept at playing one against the other.  The Chiefs must stand united against the Indians.  (A nod to my buddy John for the phrasing on this one.)
* Your primary mission is to teach your kids the skills to be and value in being independent.  Busting down all obstacles and smoothing every bump in the road is doing your kids a disservice.  Again, the will to stand on one's own does not just pop up when one hits 18.  Or 21.  Or any other age.  So sayeth Another Childless Douche.