Friday, December 24, 2010

Arrest Ye Merry Gentlemen

Before you head off to celebrate the holidays with their family or friends, please allow me the opportunity to take off the clown hat, step off the soap box and wish you a joyous, prosperous, wondrous, and every other adjective that ends with “ous”, Christmas.  (Except maybe, “superfluous,” which runs kind of counter to the gist of my over all wish.) 

If you’re looking for further irreverence and foolishness on the Eve of this most holy occasion, you should probably look elsewhere.  I would never do something to make light of a day that’s held so sacredly by so many.


Pssst…  You really buying that?
“He don’t know me vewy well, do he?”

I got some holiday-related material this week that’s just too good not to share.

First, Bluz Sister sent me an email about a very touching letter sent from a husband to his wife, at Christmas.

Hi Sweetheart,
I am sorry about getting into an argument about putting up the Christmas lights again this year. I guess that sometimes I feel like you are pushing me too hard when you want something. I realize that I was wrong and I am apologizing for being such a hardheaded guy. All I want is for you to be happy and be able to enjoy the holiday season.

Nothing brightens the Christmas spirit like Christmas lights!

I took the time to hang the lights for you today and now I will be gone hunting.

Again, I am very sorry for the way I acted yesterday.

I'll be home later.

Love you…

Bluz Sister also sent me a brilliant video: If the Nativity Happened in the Age of Social Media.

Not to be left out, my dad, who is an inexhaustible source of online merriment, sent me this: “This is What Happens When Men Bake Cookies.”

Lastly, my friend Robyn, a fellow Steel Citi Underground member from work, sent me the perfect coda for any Christmas message that comes from a dude with Pittsburgh roots.  With that, may I present “Santa Claus is Goin Dahntahn,” (complete with English subtitles). 
(These dudes can really sing, by the way…)

So in all, I’ve already gotten just what I wanted for Christmas: enough material for an easy Christmas post.

Now just let me say thank you to you, my friend, who is sharing this holiday moment, and a number of prior moments throughout this past year.

Happy Christmas to you.  May your holiday joy and general wonderfulness be surpassed only by the amount of really cool presents you get.

Bluz out…


Oilfield Trash said...

The pic of the cookies is classic.

Merry Christmas.

bluzdude said...

Merry Christmas, Trash.

Raven said...

Love the Christmas laughs Bluz, thank you for not changing your beautiful self just to keep from offending millions of people on their most sacred day. ;) I hope you have a delightful Christmas and a fantabulous New Year.

bluzdude said...

I gotta be me, Raven! Glad you enjoyed and I hope you've had a wonderful Christmas.

Judie said...

Bluz, you certainly know how to warm the hearts of your readers at Christmas. And I think your dad is one cool Dude!

bluzdude said...

With Jack Daniels?

Judie said...

No, with your winning personality, and a bottle of Stoli!!

Bea said...

OK, those cookies *might* be the reason your blog is now classified "porn" at work. *snort*

Sarah said...

Is it wrong for a "Christian" to LOL at your blog? You have some seriously x-rated stuff here. Thanks for the laugh!

bluzdude said...

Nah, they blocked my site before I posted that cookie pic.

(FYI, my company blocked Darwinfish... the error message says that it's to prevent porn from coming in. I am, suffice to say, severely pissed about that. This is site NOT in any way pornographic. There are no nudie pictures, no descriptions of sex acts... Most I'm guilty of is the occasional F-bomb. OK, maybe more than on occasion. But that's not porno. The biggest effect here is that it deprives me of my blogroll, which allows me to see who's posted something new. Anyway, it's highly inconvenient to me. Now I have to WORK all day...) (J/K, boss.)

I don't think it's wrong at all. And as I said above, I don't think there's anything X-Rated at all. Just F-bombs. And that only gets a movie an R-Rating.

But I'm actually very happy that you've found some laughs here; that's mostly all I've ever intended to do. And if there really is a God, when he created man's sense of humor, he didn't put directions on it. He left it up to us to determine what's funny. And sometimes we can't help ourselves and we laugh at stuff that intellectually, we know shouldn't be funny.

But still, just like we laugh when someone ELSE gets conked on the head and falls off a dock, we may also laugh when sport is made of established traditions and powers that may or may not be. We can't help it. And that's what keeps me in business.

Mrs. Bachelor Girl said...

Merry Christmas, Bluz!

injaynesworld said...

The man-baked gingerbread cookies are hysterical, and entirely believable.

bluzdude said...

I think we're hard wired that way. I'm pretty sure that even as a boy, I iced some boobs on a couple of the gingerbread 'men' we were making.

Kernut the Blond said...

(I could swear I left a comment a couple days ago. C'est la vie.)

I gotta say I love the butt and boob cookies. Awesome.

Happy New Year!

bluzdude said...

Alas... the Black Hole of Blogspot!

I bet you're just wondering who's been peeking in your undies drawer...

Kernut the Blond said...

@bluzdude Sadly, I'm pretty sure no one but me has.

bluzdude said...

So sad! You should definitely have someone looking at your underwear.