Tuesday, May 20, 2014

The Bald Truth, Part 2

I apologize for taking so long to come out with this post.  It was over a month ago when I asked you for your opinion on whether I should shave my head or not.  I’m sure you can guess what happened so far, because you know me… if I’d have done it by now, it would have been front page news.  (Right here, not on, say, USA Today.)

While there were only 7 people who responded on the survey tool, I also tallied up those who left comments, and those who I asked personally.  These are the results of my highly scientific poll.  [snork!]  Also included are my translations of what your vote means.

Shave head in stages: 4 (Translation: So we can get used to another goofy look, gradually.) 

Shave head immediately: 2 (Translation: The sooner you stop looking so goofy, the better.)

Might as well shave head, because it will grow back: 6 (Translation: No skin of OUR butt… We don’t really care how goofy you look.)

Don’t shave head, just cut it shorter: 0 (Translation: Doesn’t matter, you still look goofy.  Pool or pond.)

Don’t shave head, do nothing. 5 (Translation: You look goofy enough already.)

Naturally, I opted for the option that no one voted for.  (Apparently, I am one contrary bastard.)  I got my hair cut before I went to Florida, and instead of them using a “3-guard,” I had them use a “2-guard.”  So it’s a little shorter than I usually get it cut.  Once again, I was amazed by how much gray hair there was, lying on the floor behind me.  I never know what’s going on back there.  It looked like someone shaved a calico cat.

But I wanted to at least get a short cut, to better visualize what I may look like later.  I guess the longer I stewed on it, the more comfortable I became with what I had, and then the inertia set in.

I must admit though, the people what weighed in with the “Do Nothing” votes were fairly influential people in my life, including several who have to look at me on a regular basis.

Next month, I have my annual trip back to Ohio, to go visit the CFO and VP of Hell No.  Perhaps they may be able to sway me, so that we may make up a matched set of three.  If so, I will suggest some kind of ceremony, complete with photographic evidence.  We could do it right there in the Dad Cave.  (The garage.)

I don’t know… I guess I’ll just have to see how the beer is flowing…


  1. Haircuts should never be decided whilst drunk or whilst pmsing. Remember that always.



    1. If you're drunk AND PMSing, they cancel out, right?

    2. So funny you mentioned no haircut decisions while PMSing. My stylist has been cutting my hair for over 20 years. Whenever I tell her I'm bored and want to make a change, the first question she asks is whether I am PMSing. If I am, then no changes are permitted.

  2. You're like me. Ask for opinions, do the opposite. Good move, man.

    1. It wasn't intentional... Just worked out that way.


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