Thursday, December 1, 2011

My Questionable Taste

I want to bang out something quick tonight because the Penguins/Capitals game comes on at 7:00 and it’s already 6:45.  This is when the DVR pays off.  Anyway, I’m going into the archives and pulling out one of those email questionnaires that went around on email about 5 years ago and unearthing some nuggets from there.  I made a few updates to reflect the passage of 5-years time.

Sorry, not every post can be a sepia-toned memory about getting humiliated in church while wearing expensive boots.

Note: you GOTTA check out the prior post and look at the comment from Bryan (of A Beer for the Shower).  He has the all-time best church horror-show story, ever.

The Meme (which has been edited for brevity and levity): 

  1. What time did you get up this morning?  Six AM.   OK, that was when I woke up.  When I got up was 6:50.

  1. Diamonds or pearls?  Diamonds.  I don’t have anything that goes with pearls.

  1. What was the last film you saw at the cinema?  Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Pt 2.   Bloody brilliant.

  1. What’s your favorite TV show?  Modern Family and 30 Rock.

  1. What did you have for breakfast? Diet Coke and a breakfast bar.

  1. What is your middle name?  I don’t have one, but I always say that modesty is my middle name, and don’t think that didn’t get me teased on the playground.

  1. What’s your favorite meal?  Mom’s pasta or my pork chops.

  1. What foods do you dislike?  Broccoli or any other multi-syllabic, double-lettered, vowel-ending vegetable.

  1. What is your favorite CD?  Meatloaf, “Bat Out of Hell.”  (Still.)

  1. What kind of car do you drive?  2002 Chrysler Concorde… my first Big Boy car.

  1. What’s your favorite word or phase?  “Don’t mess with the Big Dog… The Big Dog is always right.” (Thank you to Tommy Lee Jones.)  Runner up: “Because Daddy knows things…” (Something I tell Pinky after something I’ve said turns out to be balls-on accurate.)

  1. What characteristics do you despise?  Inconsideration, egotism, aggressive ignorance, lack of awareness of anyone but ‘self.’  (In other words, most Maryland drivers.)

  1. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go?  Australia, just to hear them speak.

  1. What color is your bathroom?  Mold.

  1. Favorite brand of clothing?  Don’t care… anything with a Steelers or Penguins logo on it.

  1. To where would you like to retire?  A cruise ship.  I hear it’s cheaper than assisted living.  Short of that, Pittsburgh.  I’d save big on my cable bill.  All the sports packages I pay extra for are considered “local TV” there.

  1. What type of detergent do you use?  I wash in Tide (because it’s too damn cold out’tide.) 

  1. Are you a morning person or a night owl?  I’m a lunch person.

  1. What size shoe do you wear?  Size 12, which is really handy when I’m measuring rooms and stuff.

  1. Do you have pets?  No, I live vicariously through the pets of others.

  1. What did you want to be when you were younger?  Bigger and cooler, and see?  I’m half way there.

  1. Best childhood memory?  Playing outside in the neighborhood or at the local pool every day during the summer.

  1. Piercing?  Just my gaze.

  1. Ever been Toilet Papered?  Sure, but I usually do it myself.

  1. Ever love someone so much it made you cry?  Yes, but then she rolled off my schlong and I felt much better.

  1. Croutons or bacon bits?  Everything’s better with bacon.

  1. Favorite day of the week?  Saturday.

  1. Favorite restaurant?  Mom’s dining room table.

  1. Favorite ice cream?  Butter Pecan.  Got that from my dad.

  1. Favorite flower?  Torrenia.  I have a knack for growing them. 
 Also know as Clown Violets.

  1. Disney or Warner Bros.?  Warner Brothers!  Bugs rocks!

  1. Favorite fast food restaurant?  Wendy’s.

  1. How many times did you fail your driver’s test?  Never; I didn’t dare.  Besides, they have GOOD driver’s ed in Ohio.

  1. At which store would you max out your credit card?  I would NEVER max out my credit card.  (Or else I wouldn’t be able to afford my cruise ship retirement.)  But if I had to, probably Best Buy.

  1. What are you listening to right now.  The Sound of Silence.  Not the Simon and Garfunkel song, just silence.  (Obviously, Pinky isn’t here right now.)

  1. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?  The Egg, because the Chicken needed too much foreplay.


Cassie said...

1. 7! On my own! Without being accosted by children!
2. Diamonds. For real.
3. Twilight, bitches.
4. 24 and Grey's Anatomy
5. Oatmeal and a glass of water.
6. Louise
7. Don't have one.
8. Seafood
9. Probably my Live at Red Rocks DMB album
10. Volvo xc90 - fancy town.
11. What I tell Claire to repeat every day, "If I'm a good person, good things will happen to me."
12. Being afraid to admit you're wrong. (which I am from time to time.)
13. Canary Islands
14. Which one? Mine is a horrible cream splotchy paint job. Blamed on yours truly.
15. I really like Gap. It's comfy. But for exercise I do love Everlast.
16. Somewhere freaking warm.
17. All Free and Clear because my skin is mighty sensitive.
18. I'm most perky at 5 PM.
19. 10.
20. Yes. Too many.
21. I wanted to work at Target.
22. Biking around the apartment complex while listening to The Cranberries on my walkman.
23. (Oh my god your answer made me LOL.) Too many.
24. Nope.
25. Sure?
26. Sunflower seeds.
27. Sunday
28. Lot 17
29. Mint Chocolate Chip
30. Tulips
31. Disney. Ariel is the shit.
32. Is Panera considered fast food?
33. No way. NEVAH!
34. That place has EVERYTHING.
35. The Pens game.
36. Good answer, Tony!

(Didn't expect THIS as a comment now did you?)

bluzdude said...

No, I expected you do put it on your own blog. (For which I now have a snappy little button!)

4. In my original list, I said "24" as my favorite TV show.

23. Out of all these, THAT'S the one that made you LOL?

Jessica R. said...

Even your memes make me laugh. The piercing gaze made me LOL too.

Unapologetically Mundane said...

Knowing that you say "Because Daddy knows things…" to Pinky is really, really creepy.

Mary Ann said...

Great Q & A. You should be campaigning for office. We need a quick witted candidate, or, at least, a witted person.
Toilet papering is usually a sign of recognition and respect. Doing your own is most appropriate.
I am thinking of opening a restaurant, maybe in Pgh. and calling it, "Mom 'n Nem". Maybe "Noodles 'n Nat". Then you could visit your favorit restaurant and your favorite Mom at the same time.
You are the only man on the planet who knows what torrenia is. .

bluzdude said...

I never even do those memes unless I can funny’em up.

Oh come on, that’s just an expression. I don’t mean it literally. This is Maryland, not Arkansas.

Mary Ann
Funny you should mention that. I’ve got a post running around in my head about running for office, due to receiving a couple of emailed enticements to run, from the various Progressive groups that have me on their mailing list. They’re not directed to me in particular, of course, just any Progressive with free time on their hands.

Of course I have to toilet paper myself… I can’t ask anyone ELSE to do it and I certainly can’t skip it.

I love torrenia because they’re so colorful… like me!

Judie said...

Bluz, remember that song "Don't Give Up On Me, Baby"? Well, that's me, today. The Guild's annual winter show is on right now, and since I am the only person who knows a rusty f*** about running it, I am stuck at the Hilton until Sunday night. On Monday, I will start to catch up with all of my REAL friends and their blogs, but until then, please pray for me!!!

Your Hot Arizona Auntie

P.S. As for all those questions? I already know everything important about you that I really need to know, so flush those questions, and listen to me--YOU ARE A GOD!!! (Oh, I am sooo sick, or maybe I've had too much vodka tonight!!)

bluzdude said...

Enjoy the Hilton! That's one place where carrying one of your little dogs around in a purse would fit right in. Just tell everyone what to do and keep them bringing you vodka, and I'm sure the event will be as smashing as you are smashed.

But not too much vodka, or you might start seeing deities where there are only fools on a keyboard.

Kernut the Blond said...

Fun list! I love Bat Out of Hell, too.

Mrs. Bachelor Girl said...

I think we've been over this before, but you really don't have a middle name?

Your parents must be very decisive.

bluzdude said...

Yeah, these are so much fun to do. Haven't seen a new one in a while. I blame Facebook.

Mrs. Bachelor Girl,
Seriously, I was given no middle name. They just "didn't." My brother and sister have middle names. I guess my name was so spot-on that I didn't need anything further.

So now I tell people my middle name is NMI.

sherry stanfa-stanley said...

Wow, what a glimpse into the Bluz brain!

Gotta love you for the Diet Coke breakfast, of course.

And Modern Family has been my favorite show for a couple of years. But this season? Is it me, or has something gone awry? Not feeling the love anymore. Still funny, but not so much a laugh-out-loud thing.

Maybe the humor would seem sharper if I watched it at noon. I'm definitely a middle-of-the-day type person too.

bluzdude said...

I don't know... I'm still laughing out loud at Modern Family. I just love everyone on that show. And they have such heart at the center of it. Just last night, I was laughing my head off.