Saturday, November 17, 2012

Odd Bits - The Hostess Edition

First thing I need you to do is leave this post right now and go read my prior post, by either scrolling down or clicking here.  It’s a story about the time I had to take a lie detector test… not as a demonstration, but to clear me of a possible crime.  Not that it has anything to do with this post, it’s just that it’s a good story and no one has read it.  Seriously… I’ll wait. 

Oh, OK, you can come back to it.  This is me, getting on with it…

Pocket Review: The Amazing Spiderman
When I first heard that they were remaking Spiderman and covering the original story, I couldn't believe it.  I mean, the Spiderman movie with Tobey Maguire only came out 10 years ago… do we really need a remake already? 

I was dead set against seeing it.  However, seeing the trailer for it, when I was at the movies this summer, pried my mind open a little bit.  It looked cheeky and very exciting.  So when it came out on Blu-Ray last week, I bought it.

Turns out, it was a good call.  While it’s essentially the same “origin” story, they tweaked it enough that it wasn't just a copy of what had already been filmed in 2002.  The action was good and the CGI wasn't nearly as noticeable as it was in the first film.  (They also used more of a real guy swinging from a wire in order to use less of the CGI.)

I also liked the female lead, Gwen Stacey, (played by Emma Stone), who was much more than a damsel in distress.  She was the intellectual equal of Peter Parker and helped him as much as he helped her.  The dialog between the two snapped and crackled like this morning’s Rice Krispies.

So if you like the “comic book movie” genre, give it a shot.  Even if you liked the last three Spiderman movies, there’s no reason not to see this one.  I’ll be interested to see how they progress the series from here.

The Hostess with the Mostest
It’s cracking me up seeing everyone lose their minds about Hostess going out of business.  People are buying up Twinkies and Ho-hos as if their childhoods couldn't be relived without them.

My siblings and I pretty much missed the whole Hostess thing.  Hostess snacks never graced our pantry nor our lunch bags.  All I could do was look longingly at my classmates as they snarfed up their Wonder Bread sandwiches and crème-filled Twinkies, while I ate my little box of raisins. 

Twinkies were OK, but I never got hooked on them… I was much more interested in obtaining Pop Tarts, which were another verboten treat.  Every so often, I’d get a Twinkie out of a vending machine, just to satisfy my rebellious side, but they weren't that great.  Other than that, it was Little Debbie who was more of a presence in our household.  Boy, that little tart could bake some mean-ass brownies.

But there was a time, as a young adult, when I ate Hostess Fruit Pies like they were going out of style.  Man, I loved the cherry and lemon ones. 
I know that graphics have changed, but this is the package I remember.

I’d still eat those things by the truckload, if they weren't so high in calories.  You could tell by the weight of the package that a fruit pie would fill you up between meals.  It had “heft.”

Anyway, I don’t think there’s any reason for America’s sugar junkies to panic.  I’m sure someone will buy the rights to produce our cherished goodies.  There’s too much money to be made.  In fact, this may just be a hoax after all.  Maybe Hostess just needed to clear some room on the nations 7-11 shelves, for some new product.

Unleash the Pointless Investigations!
I can’t really take the GOP “outrage” over the Benghazi attack seriously.  I think they've decided their strategy for the next four years is going to be endless, pointless investigation of every blip in the geopolitical world.  In other words, they’re going to “Clinton” the president to death.  Benghazi and Patraeus are just the beginning.

Remember all the outrage over the seven fatal incidents at US Embassies during the Bush years?  Of course you don’t, because there wasn't any.

The GOP knows that as long as they’re monopolizing the press by pointing fingers at Obama, nobody is talking about their own toxic message that got their asses kicked in the November elections.  When in doubt, shift the blame.

Ratbird Stew
One of the Steelers two biggest games of the year is coming up, when they play the Ratbirds on Sunday night.  (The other one is the 2nd time they play the Rats, two games later.)  Before last week’s game, I was expecting a Steelers win against the Rats tomorrow and a loss two weeks later when they play in Baltimore.  But that was before QB Ben Roethlisberger got knocked out of the Chiefs game with a separated sterno-clavicular joint and a dislocated first rib.  The way things look, he’s going to be out for quite a while.

The Steelers are 0-4 against the Ratties when Ben isn't playing.  I think it’s going to take a heroic effort on everyone’s part, especially the Steeler defense, if they are to win on Sunday.  Personally, I doubt it.  I mean, I’ll still be rocking my game-day mojo, but I’m not expecting any miracles.
The Steelers are going with their 1934 “jailbreak” throwbacks, so I’m wearing my 1933 “butt-ugly” throwback, with white Steelers sweat pants and Steelers socks.

I was going to wear it to work on Friday for jersey day (aka Purple Friday, for those that aren't me), but since I knew I was going to wear it for the game, I declined.  I haven’t had much success when wearing the same jersey on both Friday and Sunday.  Good thing I have my spreadsheet to check these things out.


If you like the Steelers, you should check me out on Twitter, during the game by following me at @DarwinfishBluz.  I’ll be dropping my keen strategic observations, making fun of the Ratbirds, complaining about our quarterback and insulting the announcers.  (OK, maybe not much of the latter… Michaels and Collinsworth do a good job.)  It’ll be just like watching the game with friends at the bar, only without the noise, peeing and beer breath.


Mary Ann said...

Never having had Hostess scrappola as a kid, you also never enjoyed obesity, tooth decay, diabetes, acne, nausea and hyper-activity.
You could have called Child Services to report the deprivation and abuse.

bluzdude said...

I would have but we didn't have 911 yet. But I could have reported you to Grandma. We could always hit her up for some Pop Tarts.

Mary Ann said...

especially BLOO-Berry
She kept them in her purse.

Reeik said...

You and your FREAKING spread sheets !!!! And the Blueberry Pies were the BEST !!!! I just confirmed on my spread sheet/belly .....

bluzdude said...

Spreadsheets bring order to the galaxy. Besides, without tracking and analyzing capability, Game Jersey Mojo is just a lot of superstitious mumbo-jumbo.

Reeik said...

you know what LEARCH would say and I must agree !!

bluzdude said...

"You rang?"

Anonymous said...

The hostess pandemonium seems suspect- I'm sure they are drumming up publicity to sell the name off for more money. And the CEO has a house full of the stuff and has it all on EBAY for 50 bucks a pack.

bluzdude said...

Same old story... A couple of people are making serious bank, while the rest of us get screwed.

Anonymous said...

Those were some damn fugly bumblebee costumes the Squeelers were wearing last night. They obviously weren't lucky outfits, either. :p

bluzdude said...

They could have been wearing gold-plated kevlar, or Harry Potter's Cloak of Invisibility, and they still wouldn't have won that game with Leftwich at QB. If Ben was in there last night, Steelers win by 14. The Ratbirds scored all of 3 points on the Steelers defense.

Unapologetically Mundane said...

But the cupcakes! THE CUPCAKES! The way the icing just lies on top of the cake, almost forcing you to peel it off and eat it separately. I would be genuinely sad if I never had one of those again.

I need some Christmas-themed Cadbury Eggs to make me feel better.

bluzdude said...

I'm sure another company will come along and re-start the ovens. Don't get your cupcakes in a bunch...

thoughtsappear said...

I love Twinkies, and those chocolate cupcakes, and the Snoballs. But those pies hold a special place in my heart as well. The same flavors as you: cherry and lemon!

Cassie said...

I agree about the Spiderman movie! I was hesitant, but then I really liked the dude who played Peter Parker. He was so likable! And it's not that I didn't like Toby, but he played such a NERD. This boy was just awkward and so cute to boot. I enjoyed it a lot more than I thought I would.

And I also agree about Gwen Stacey. She was SO not screaming and all kinds of lame like MJ had been. I always liked the other Spider Man movies, but I just couldn't stand the MJ character. So when they make another one with these actors, I'm definitely going to go see it.

bluzdude said...

Those pies could really fill you up… that’s why I liked them so much, aside from the general yumminess.

bluzdude said...

Yeah, the actor, Andrew Garfield, did a really good job. The high school world they created seemed a lot more realistic… other than being populated with 25-year old “high school” kids…

I said to Pinky when Gwen first came on the screen… “That’s no high school student…”

But yeah, I’ll probably see the next one in the theater.

Also, I bet your kids have never had a Twinkie or Fruit Pie, have they?