Thursday, April 7, 2011

Scent by the Gods

One of the fringe benefits of being a famous popular occasionally amusing mildly read blogger is that I seem to have become the repository for all bacon-related stories.  As you may recall from 2 posts ago, devoted reader and FOD (Friend of D-Fish), “DG,” sent me the blurb about Denny’s new Maple Bacon Sundae (about which I am still getting feedback).

This week, FsOD Carpetbagger and Cassie have both sent me this next item.  Or should I say, “Scent” me this item?

In a long overdue development, there seems to have been a bacon-scented fragrance put on the market.  It’s called “bacōn”, (pronounced bay-CONE) and created by a company called Fargginay.
Why do they have two versions?  Is one of them “crispy?”

I love the name and pronunciation… it allows them to be artsy-fartsy AND salt-of-the-earth at the same time.

Both Bagger and Cassie sent me the link to the Huffington Post article on it, and I swear, if it would have been dated last Friday, I’d have been sure it was an April Fools joke.

It quoted the press release as such:

bacōn is a passion project mirrored after one of the 20th Century's greatest legends. The Legend of Fargginay began in 1920 when quite by accident John Fargginay, a Parisian butcher discovered the ability to dramatically elevate his customers' mood with a secret recipe blending herbs & essential oils with the essence of...bacon. As the story goes, film stars & heads of state would frequent his shop to procure the magical elixir. With a wink of the eye and the secret code, "fargginay," customers would be slipped a discreet pouch containing the formula said to trigger pleasant memories. After a massive fire on July 4, 1924, the business was lost and so was the formula...Until now.

“Farginnay.”  What a great name for a company. 

Yinz are really making bacon cologne?

Farginnay!

What’s next, a whole line of comfort food colognes?  Macaroni and cheese?  Pumpkin pie?  Home-made bread?  Primanti’s?

The Bagger went on to say that “It would be great if they had sexy, stylish ads by spokesmen such as Rosie O’Donnell, James Gandolfini and John Goodman… all urgently whispering “I smell Bay-Cone!

I suggested the topical Kirstie Alley.  He countered with the also topical Meat Loaf, who I think would be perfect!  Meat Loaf wrapped in bacōn!  What’s not to love?

As it turns out, the company already has a commercial on YouTube:

I had been wondering why this was being marketed as a scent for guys… the commercial provides the answer.  Otherwise, I was thinking it should totally be marketed to women.  Couple spritzes of this stuff and guys will be circling like puppies after a pork chop. 


From the “Unrelated” Department
More goofy shit from Failblog.org.  This one kills me:

17 comments:

  1. Bacon cologne huh? I am not sure about that one. Although I bet it would be a hit in the Middle East if you changed the name and didn't tell them it was made from bacon. lol

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  2. Trash,
    I bet that would generate a whole new wave of bombings, wouldn't it?

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  3. Either that or they would realize that pork is not so bad.

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  4. Hahaha! OMG, my 21-year-old son just told me tonight I should consider getting remarried. This is my new step in that direction. I figure with just a couple sprays, I'll be a total man-magnet! Thanks for the suggestion. You'll be invited to the reception. I'm guessing we'll be serving pork.

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  5. That would totally work. Take a woman with your charms and wrap her in bacon scent? Total dude magnet.

    Maybe they can design a special Tony Packo's variety for Northwest Ohioans...

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  6. Now I want spinoff scents, such as On-Yahn, Cat-Feesh, and Gar-Leek.

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  7. Fargginay is going to be the new Farvegnughan [sic].

    Also: No. No thank you. Let's just say that I usually hate when meat is cooked in my house, so a cologne? Uh-uh.

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  8. Wow. Just wow.

    I would totally wear perfume that smelled like fresh baked chocolate chip cookies however... and it would probably have the same effect on women.

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  9. Cowboy, you've done it again!

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  10. Bagger
    Ewww! Now that’s gross. Bacone, and my other proposed scents smell good!

    I think they already have something called “garlique,” it sounds familiar. I think it’s a pill or something. I did laugh at “Cat-Feesh” though.

    Thanks again to you and Cassie for the head’s up on this important new product.

    Red Pen Mama
    I certainly hope you don’t have anything against cooking meat at someone else’s house… Stay tuned for further developments.

    Farginnay is so much fun to say, when you roll the ‘r’ like Roman Maroney would…
    “Farrrginnay!”

    (FYI, I acknowledge that anyone that has never seen the movie “Johnny Dangerously” will have no idea what I’m talking about, nor would they recognize the guy in the Farginnay picture. The question is; what are you waiting for?)

    Jessica
    For what it’s worth, I’d be all over chocolate chip cookie-scented perfume as well. I’d have to nibble your neck, than have a glass of milk. Just be glad I wouldn’t have enough milk to “dunk.”

    Judie
    By Jove, I have!

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  11. I think I'll be skipping the bacon cologne. Love that sign though. :D

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  12. Judging from my comments, the only thing a guy wearing this cologne will be attracting, is other guys.

    Damn.

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  13. Yeah -- it's definitely a guy thing. If you want to attract women, find a way to bottle the scent of puppy breath.

    Love the graffiti.

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  14. Jayne,
    Yeah, they're marketing this all wrong. It should totally be a perfume to attract guys.

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  15. When I was a young and desperately poor Bachelor Girl, I used to dab vanilla extract behind my ears when I ran out of perfume, and men

    LOVED THE SHIT OUT OF IT.

    I'm serious. I got more compliments on something I bought for $2.99 in the baking aisle at Kroger than I ever have on a $100 bottle of the (supposed) good stuff.

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  16. Mrs. Bachelor Girl,
    That's a great idea! Why stop? No sense in spending big bucks on fancy schmancy perfumes when good old Vanilla works just fine...

    Of course, the next thing you know, The Guy will be requesting Chocolate or Strawberry...

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